“”This Stone” is about trying to make something work but coming to the realization that it never will—you can keep on being miserable or make a change. It’s about walking away, and it turned out to be prophetic. It foreshadowed some important emotional truths I ended up facing. And I’ll be damned if the Pfaltzgraff wedding china I inherited from my grandmother didn’t literally start cracking and falling apart! Be careful what you write, I guess.
I came up with a first draft of “This Stone” with my friends Paul Ivy and Norm McDonald—who had both been through a divorce—and I just couldn’t get the song out of my head. I played it over and over alone in my room. At first, I was thinking it was just a rough sketch, and that the lyrics still needed a lot of work. But the more I played it, the more every line just felt so achingly true and honest. I couldn’t bring myself to change a word, and Norm and Paul couldn’t either. Whenever I sang it, there was something that connected on a deep, emotional level.
This was toward the end of working on the new record, so I called my producer, Dave Coleman, and asked if we could squeeze in one more session. We went into the studio with Jeff Thorneycroft on bass and Pete Pulkrabek on drums, just as everyone was getting ready to go out of town for Christmas. Along with “Ride the Wolf,” another song we cut in the final session, “This Stone” was the last piece of the puzzle we needed to finish the record. After that, everything felt right. The vibe Dave, Jeff and Pete cooked up was perfect. During overdubs, Dave and my neighbor, Kristen Cothron, added backing vocals that really brought weight and power to the song.
I have a reputation as someone who does not write happy songs. I usually stick to minor keys, I can be a bit macabre, and I’ve been known to kill off a character or two. The day we wrote “This Stone”, Norm came up with the idea about droplets of wine. I, of course, made the connection between wine and blood. And then I started laughing and begging, “Guys, PLEASE let me make this song weird!” Thankfully, Norm and Paul were there to bring it back down to earth and make sure the song felt emotionally true. They were adamant we couldn’t just blame the male character, which I may or may not have a habit of doing. Real life isn’t one-sided like a man-hating country breakup song. It’s more complicated—there’s usually plenty of blame to go around. Plus, the song is sadder that way, which is cool with me.
After the recording was finished, my husband and I had survived an incredibly stressful and tumultuous year thanks to my cancer diagnosis, which inevitably spilled over into our marriage. But “This Stone” gave me a precious gift—it was an outlet for all those feelings deep beneath the surface.”
